Even post-post election we still find ourselves chanting “FOUR MORE BEERS FOUR MORE QUEERS” because why not? Congrats to the First Ladies Brawl Champion- The Incumbent! If it ain’t broke, don’t fix it. She beat out undead-fresh Funkenstein in the Final Match to take home her trophy and endless amounts of tax breaks. Mad style props to Amelia Armhart who was literally flown in over the crowd and Coco LaCroix , that thirsty lady who sparkled up the stage. We saw cats from the former Soviet bloc and Secretaries of State showing their wild side. (Just a tip, Hillary2016.) The Iron Butterfly went through a stunning metamorphosis, there was pupa everywhere. The Nurse may have committed medical malpractice but we can’t be sure. Get me some of dat Obamacare.
President Barack himself dropped by to celebrate his victory and explain how our great State of Louisiana doesn’t provide for much needed programs such as the Rape Crisis Center’s medical advocacy center. Therefore, NO LAW raised $3,300 dollars for ’em! New record bringing an end to our 3rd year in existence. We are so proud to support the New Orleans Family Justice Center and the work they do. Well done, entourage, you savvy bunch of hustlers. Shoutouts to our DJs and celebrity judges, Sarah Palin and her new bestie, Snookie, for keeping it real. And thank YOU, crowd, scandalous betters and bribers that you are.
Get more involved with the Rape Crisis Center or NO LAW by emailing email@example.com! Be an entourage member or apply as a beneficiary. Try your biceps at wrestling, bake something for the wrestlers or hold a sign, there’s room for all. News on next brawls and appearances to come.
The seasons are changing and we’re ready for anything.
Find us this Autumn at Endless Gaycation and Fringe Festival with arm wrestling booths for your competitive enjoyment. Details to come.
Save the date! Next brawl is November 10th at One Eyed Jack’s. Email firstname.lastname@example.org to get involved in so many, many ways.
The show at One Eyed Jack’s was a big time big top success raising $3,000 for Liberty’s Kitchen, our highest amount yet! Their wrestler, Lady Liberty, took home the gold(en trophy). USA! USA! Hot Sauce put up a tough battle with a spicy, sassy entourage backing her the whole time. Sriracha never looked this badass.
The crowd got a little lesson on what it means to be Midwestern. OMAHA, NEBRASKA really, really represented. There was corn everywhere. Shoutout to our sisters from Austin, TX: Gina Tonic and the Cheer Squad. All the wrestlers were incredible from Lil Night Mer’s rejection of convention to Plague from the Hague’s impressive clog dancing. The Pelican Brief had the whole package: undies, feathers and clever signage. Birthday Sex offered an explanation of ALL the options consenting adults have on their happy day. Our Bribe Babe created a spectacle by wrestling her twin. Was it Tweedle Dee or Tweedle Dum who had the sister victory? Could you tell? Do they know? We don’t know.
Big thanks to the entertainment with a hilariously lovely performance by Trixie Minx and Niki Frisky’s defiance of gravity, plus a hoops act by Niki, Summer and…a dancing banana. Celebrity judges Miss eNOLA Gay and Miss Asa Metrical handled the tie breaking via tough trivia and aerobic exercise. There was even some locomotion commotion. XOXO to DJs Justin and Brian, all the business who donated prizes, the entourages workin to collect all that dough and our beautiful, generous audience. Your support keeps it all rolling. Amid the hoopla, we said farewell to our wonderful MC Charlie. NO LAW is going to miss you so so much. Best of luck in all your future endeavors. Bring some of dat bounce to DCLAW.
MC Charles Daffodil
Liberty’s Kitchen helps at risk youth develop employable skills while providing a supportive community. Yeah!
Dance party with DJ Justin and Brian Boyles. Halftime acts of burlesque and trapeze by Trixie Minx, the Mystic Ponies and more!
We are hauling collective ass up to Charlottesville, VA for the intergalactic ladies arm wrestling battle in a mere 14 days and just cannot wait to bring it. Sistah Mary Slammer is ripped and ready to brawl upon the hallowed ground where it all began. Amen. The New Orleans beneficiary for June 16th’s Super CLAW is Hagar’s House, who was our very first recipient ever. They continue to be a fantastic home for women and children and we are proud to support them.
Check out the amazing national website and description of NOLAW’s lovely lady of the cloth. Slam Em Sistah!
$1,500 to the girls program at Covenant House from the Matriarchal Mayhem Maytime Brawl! Big ups to DJs Justin Thomas and Brian Boyles, Howlin Wolf, photographer Katrina Arnold, Celebrity Judges and all the amazing wrestlers and their entourages. Also, mad thanks to Kristen Schaal, of The Daily Show and 30 Rock fame, for hanging with us. She bested our Referee arm to arm and kind of maybe sort of not really got married. We love you. Kristen Schaal is a horse.
Really the biggest surprise of the night though was Grandma Foots’ transformation from shuffling little old lady next door to a neon colored dancing arm wrestling fiend. She had us all fooled. Thanks for the long con, Grandma. She made it all the way to the final round but was defeated by new champ, Cosmic Crusher. Space power took home the gorgeous trophy from the girls at Covenant House. Our other wrestlers were on top of their game too. Babe Lincoln and her Vampires treated the audience to teeth and campaign swag. Pillar of Assault got some Snookie loving and the Second Wave showed Bingo Cunninglino what old school feminism is all about. You all rule.
Join us this Saturday at One Eyed Jack’s for Rights of Spring, a fundraiser for Planned Parenthood with Fleur de Tease. Cover is ten bucks for some amazing burlesque, ladies arm wrestling booth and erotic readings of Roe v. Wade. Doors at 9, show starts at ten.
NO LAW is going on the road! We head to Charlottesville, VA in June for SuperCLAW. This will be the first ever national ladies arm wrestling championship, bringing together leagues from all over the country. Sistah Mary Slammer will be repping us hard and we want to win! More information and excitement to come.
It’s a busy busy Spring for us, and we want to see your lovely faces all about town.
Friday April 20th, 8 pm at the Howlin Wolf. V Day NOLA 2012: The Vagina Monologues. Proceeds benefit Hagar’s House for Women & Children. Cover is a sliding scale from $12-$25 dollars. We will be mini brawling at the After Party along with the Organ Grinders, Daria and the Hip Drops and DJ Nice Rack. If you can’t make it on Friday, there will also be a performance of the monologues Sunday April 22nd at Cafe Istanbul in the Healing Center for 6 pm.
Saturday May 12th, 8 pm at the Howlin Wolf. NO LAW’s Matriarchal Mayhem Maytime BRAWL! Proceeds will benefit Covenant House. Expect brawling babes, flashy half time performances and so much goodness. Get in touch with us to wrestle, perform, be involved in any way, etc, etc.
Saturday May 26th, 10 pm at One Eyed Jacks. Planned Parenthood Benefit. Fleur de Tease will be putting on a great show and we’ll be there with an arm wrestling booth for your amateur enjoyment. Support the Gulf Coast Chapter of Planned Parenthood! Tickets $10-$15
Saturday June 16th, First Annual SUPERCLAW in Charlottesville, VA at the Jefferson Theater. Lady arm wrestlers from across the country will be throwing down and NO LAW plans to bring the party. 5-0-4.