Bets and bribes go to Crescent City Childcare Collective. DJ Justin and DJ Frenchbraid dance party to follow.
Tag Archives: DJ Justin
Now that the pesky apocalypse is out of the way we can get with the brawlin. This was NO LAW’s third year of ladies arm wrestling and it was incredibly successful. 2012 saw a surprise guest appearance by Kristen Schaal, a road trip to Charlottesville, VA for the First National Super CLAW and collaborations with V-Day, Fleur de Tease, Queerspiracy and many more.
In four brawls we raised $9,100.00 for organizations/projects in the community. Yikes! We could not have done any of it without One Eyed Jack’s, DJs Justin and Brian Boyles, wrestlers, entourage members, celebrity judges, donations and the fun, lovely folks who attended the events, throwing their hard earned money at the beneficiaries. Seriously, thank you.
Please come be a part of the matriarchal mayhem. We are starting to envision the 2013 season and would love to get more folks involved. *As a collective we resist and reject sexism, ageism, homophobia, transphobia, classism and racism. Just a few ways to help:
-Wrestle! : We can always use new or repeat personas to throw down. Make a scene.
-Apply to be a beneficiary: Part of an group that is women focused? Shoot us an email and we’ll send you the tiny application.
-Donate a prize: The bets, bribes and raffle are a huge part of what we raise every brawl. Provide an incentive for the crowd to make it rain. We welcome anything from coffee shop gift certificates to DIY offers of a free bike tune up or a weekend of pet sitting. Let’s get creative, y’all.
HEY! You’re part of it. Jump into the NO LAW fray. Do whatcha wanna. YOLO (or whatever the kids are saying these days).
Even post-post election we still find ourselves chanting “FOUR MORE BEERS FOUR MORE QUEERS” because why not? Congrats to the First Ladies Brawl Champion- The Incumbent! If it ain’t broke, don’t fix it. She beat out undead-fresh Funkenstein in the Final Match to take home her trophy and endless amounts of tax breaks. Mad style props to Amelia Armhart who was literally flown in over the crowd and Coco LaCroix , that thirsty lady who sparkled up the stage. We saw cats from the former Soviet bloc and Secretaries of State showing their wild side. (Just a tip, Hillary2016.) The Iron Butterfly went through a stunning metamorphosis, there was pupa everywhere. The Nurse may have committed medical malpractice but we can’t be sure. Get me some of dat Obamacare.
President Barack himself dropped by to celebrate his victory and explain how our great State of Louisiana doesn’t provide for much needed programs such as the Rape Crisis Center’s medical advocacy center. Therefore, NO LAW raised $3,300 dollars for ’em! New record bringing an end to our 3rd year in existence. We are so proud to support the New Orleans Family Justice Center and the work they do. Well done, entourage, you savvy bunch of hustlers. Shoutouts to our DJs and celebrity judges, Sarah Palin and her new bestie, Snookie, for keeping it real. And thank YOU, crowd, scandalous betters and bribers that you are.
Get more involved with the Rape Crisis Center or NO LAW by emailing firstname.lastname@example.org! Be an entourage member or apply as a beneficiary. Try your biceps at wrestling, bake something for the wrestlers or hold a sign, there’s room for all. News on next brawls and appearances to come.
The show at One Eyed Jack’s was a big time big top success raising $3,000 for Liberty’s Kitchen, our highest amount yet! Their wrestler, Lady Liberty, took home the gold(en trophy). USA! USA! Hot Sauce put up a tough battle with a spicy, sassy entourage backing her the whole time. Sriracha never looked this badass.
The crowd got a little lesson on what it means to be Midwestern. OMAHA, NEBRASKA really, really represented. There was corn everywhere. Shoutout to our sisters from Austin, TX: Gina Tonic and the Cheer Squad. All the wrestlers were incredible from Lil Night Mer’s rejection of convention to Plague from the Hague’s impressive clog dancing. The Pelican Brief had the whole package: undies, feathers and clever signage. Birthday Sex offered an explanation of ALL the options consenting adults have on their happy day. Our Bribe Babe created a spectacle by wrestling her twin. Was it Tweedle Dee or Tweedle Dum who had the sister victory? Could you tell? Do they know? We don’t know.
Big thanks to the entertainment with a hilariously lovely performance by Trixie Minx and Niki Frisky’s defiance of gravity, plus a hoops act by Niki, Summer and…a dancing banana. Celebrity judges Miss eNOLA Gay and Miss Asa Metrical handled the tie breaking via tough trivia and aerobic exercise. There was even some locomotion commotion. XOXO to DJs Justin and Brian, all the business who donated prizes, the entourages workin to collect all that dough and our beautiful, generous audience. Your support keeps it all rolling. Amid the hoopla, we said farewell to our wonderful MC Charlie. NO LAW is going to miss you so so much. Best of luck in all your future endeavors. Bring some of dat bounce to DCLAW.
MC Charles Daffodil
$1,500 to the girls program at Covenant House from the Matriarchal Mayhem Maytime Brawl! Big ups to DJs Justin Thomas and Brian Boyles, Howlin Wolf, photographer Katrina Arnold, Celebrity Judges and all the amazing wrestlers and their entourages. Also, mad thanks to Kristen Schaal, of The Daily Show and 30 Rock fame, for hanging with us. She bested our Referee arm to arm and kind of maybe sort of not really got married. We love you. Kristen Schaal is a horse.
Really the biggest surprise of the night though was Grandma Foots’ transformation from shuffling little old lady next door to a neon colored dancing arm wrestling fiend. She had us all fooled. Thanks for the long con, Grandma. She made it all the way to the final round but was defeated by new champ, Cosmic Crusher. Space power took home the gorgeous trophy from the girls at Covenant House. Our other wrestlers were on top of their game too. Babe Lincoln and her Vampires treated the audience to teeth and campaign swag. Pillar of Assault got some Snookie loving and the Second Wave showed Bingo Cunninglino what old school feminism is all about. You all rule.
Join us this Saturday at One Eyed Jack’s for Rights of Spring, a fundraiser for Planned Parenthood with Fleur de Tease. Cover is ten bucks for some amazing burlesque, ladies arm wrestling booth and erotic readings of Roe v. Wade. Doors at 9, show starts at ten.
NO LAW is going on the road! We head to Charlottesville, VA in June for SuperCLAW. This will be the first ever national ladies arm wrestling championship, bringing together leagues from all over the country. Sistah Mary Slammer will be repping us hard and we want to win! More information and excitement to come.
Our Lenten Brawl was a success of biblical proportions. $1,300 is going to Birthmark Doula Collective, which is enough to buy TWO birthing tubs and upkeep materials for a year. Well done betters and bribers! This past throwdown saw the comeback of crowd favorite SlamRock O’Hagan. She was smashed by the Harlem Hammer, in the end, who had the intense eye contact skills and attitude to become our newest champ.
MC Nina was taken out by the woman who brought her into this world. Tete La Plenty showed us what tough stuff she was made of while her entourage glitter bombed the first five rows of the audience. Sister Mary Slammer graced us with her presence to provide blessings and settle the centuries long debate of Christianity or Judaism when she beat the Circumcisor in a special arm wrestling holy war. Somewhere between weilding an umbrella and burning Chris Brown’s reputation, celebrity judge Rihanna found time to practice her planking skills for a bribe-sponsored match between illustrious butt ref Big Ern McBurn and former contender, the Vagitarian. Immigrants, religious enthusiasts and many sassy folks all put on an amazing show and got our 2012 season off to a great start.
Humongous thank yous to DJs Justin and Brian Boyles (especially for the continuing after party at Handsome Willy’s), the Camel Toe Lady Steppers, Praline Dupre and the Howlin Wolf. Photos are by Katrina Arnold, check her out for all your freelance needs.
Look for our next brawl in May!
Proceeds benefit the Birthmark Doula Collective whose mission is to assist women in having the most positive and empowering birth experience possible. “We aim to provide our services to women regardless of age, race, income level, sexuality, ability and religion.”
Half time shows with the Camel Toe Lady Steppers and burlesque by Praline Dupre. DJs Justin and Brian Boyles will pump the jams AND the post tournament dance party!
Just for fun and getting the NO LAW fam together before the end of the year, we bring you a gathering at Handsome Willy’s this Friday, December 2nd. DJ Justin will provide the tunes from 9-11 pm. Come hang out!
Super Brawl was a super duper success! The event raised $2,500 for Common Ground Health Clinic to update their Women’s Resource Guide. Thanks to the generosity from you all, CGHC will be able to work on a Spanish language version as well. That’s fantastic. Big thank yous to the Howlin Wolf for fulfilling our High Life needs, DJ Justin for the killer beats and Katrina Arnold for the fabulous live shots and portraits that will be coming soon. We also had Billy Hunt and Brian Wimer, the geniuses behind the upcoming CLAW documentary, as guest videographers. They created a ridiculously entertaining dance video with material from the brawl. Do take a look.
Who is more competitive than a collection of previously victorious lady arm wrestlers? That was a trick question. There is no one with more of a desire to win an on stage, costumed yet physical competition than our champions. NO LAW started the night off with a bounce national anthem sung by Sarah Palin as the wrestlers were introduced. Celebrity judges Snooky and Councilwoman Kristen Palmer provided running commentary throughout the night, bringing in money by taunting the wrestlers and the audience, goading them on to bigger and better bribing. The entourages were at the peak of style, as gladiators, geeks, girls on fire and mustachioed Cajuns. Half time performances brought the show to a new level with burlesque by Praline Dupre and a jive-ass show by dance troupe NOLA Hip-Hop.
Bait and Tackle and Sistah Slammer were so evenly matched from the get go they had to dance it out, Slammer moving on as the victor of the booty shaking. The president of Chi Omega was in New Orleans on Spring Break, so she stepped in for a missing champion, charge card in hand. Swamp Thang found power through her ever popular nutria bikini to end the sibling rivalry and defeat her sister, our very own Councilwoman Palmer. Long time crowd favorite Phiery Phoenix refused to burn out or fade away all night, gathering bribes for re-dos and even subbed in to provide left handed power for the last round. You all rule ladies.
Then there was the Final Match. For the whole enchilada. All the marbles. The whole ball of wax. The Denominator (formerly known as Crybaby) vs. The Viper. Cheers were chanted, math problems were solved. A gaggle of patriotic ladies waged an enthusiasm war against a tribe of nerds. It came down to sheer strength of arm and the Viper left the table victorious! She was rewarded with much hissing and a skeleton trophy. Power! Glory! Mayhem!